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Internship Newsletter: February 2006

Happy Valentine's Day from CLI !

Internship as a Couple 

Internship is a challenge for everyone. It is a new way of life, a whole new set of demands. The challenge is even greater when both spouses are on internship. We asked Kelly and John Ahola to reflect on that experience. Kelly is interning at Zion Lutheran Church in Pelican Rapids, MN, and John at Trinity Lutheran, also in Pelican Rapids. This is what they had to say:

Kelly says:

I don’t need to tell you all what internship is like and I have been thinking how to describe our “couple internship." It is probably like the difference between raising twins and raising one child. Some things are twice as difficult, some things are twice as fun and there is never enough time in a day! For some reason our churches do not plan meetings on the same nights so other than on Wednesdays (when we are both always gone) it feels as if there is some agenda to make sure that both interns are not home at the same time. It has been fun to go to sporting events or school events and see members from both congregations and we look forward to some Sunday exchanging pulpits.

Coming and going is probably the easiest way to explain how I see our internship; we just are often passing each other on the way out or in.

Funerals might seem to come in threes at churches but that too trades off as John’s church had a cluster of losses before Christmas and mine had them the beginning of January.

Just one example reflecting the differences in our congregations: I think John has worn his clergy shirt three times a week, while I have worn mine about four times all year!

The double blessings are from knowing that my husband is not only a partner in life, but understands what it is like to preach, teach, and learn on internship and to share in our experiences makes this year exponentially educational, busy and teaches us to depend on God in our marriage, in our ministry and with our families!

John says:

I too have been thinking about what I would tell an intern couple getting ready to go on internship. It seems that many of the issues we face are the same that most working couples face.

As we write this article, my internship site is planning the fourteenth or fifteenth funeral at the church since we started internship and Kelly just got the call telling her a parishioner has died. Both of these will be funerals on Monday: our day off together. Over the last four weeks, we will have been involved in eight funerals between us. As Kelly wrote, our churches run on two different schedules. One of us is coming when the other is going or we both are just plain tired. It is easy to neglect your spouse because it takes time and energy to be present.

Another issue is trying to balance some of the social obligations of being an Intern’s spouse with those of being an intern, managing the web of expectations. With multiple Christmas parties, potlucks, and special worship services it is hard sometimes to pick events to go to. The school sporting events are great, because we see and talk to members from both our churches.

On the positive side, it is nice to have a spouse that is going through similar experiences. We can be there for each other and hold each other up in prayer. We get to see how two churches operate and how two pastors and church councils handle similar issues. On a personal note, nothing brings me greater joy than hearing people tell me how much they like my wife’s preaching and how wonderful she is.

Introducing Elba Selby  
by Steve McKinley

The most fascinating aspects of a person are often those below the surface, those things you would never guess on casual meeting.

Take Elba Selby, part of the CLI staff on the PLTS campus in Berkeley. On meeting her, you might not guess that Elba is currently pursuing a long-held passion and studying tap dancing, preparing for her first “show” coming up this summer. Nor would you guess that she grew up speaking Spanish as much as English. This is a fascinating person!

Elba is a native Californian, born to Puerto Rican parents who had five children, all of whom still live close enough together to make it possible for them to celebrate all major occasions together and a few minor ones as well. She went through 12 years of Roman Catholic parochial school education in San Francisco, and then attended San Francisco State, where she met George, her husband for the last 27 years. They spent their first year of marriage living in Barrow, AK, north of the Arctic Circle and then had a few months in Anchorage before coming home to California.

The Selbys have two adult children: Elizabeth (24) who has been married for the 2 ½ years and John (21) who lives at home. When Elizabeth came along, Elba chose to be a stay-at-home mom, and says that she is “…grateful and fortunate to have been able to do so.” For the next 17 years she was a school volunteer, a sports mom, a Girl Scout leader, and an active church volunteer.

Six years ago Elba joined the PLTS family as Facilities Coordinator. Two years ago she moved over to the CLI office, where she now works with Alicia Vargas three days a week. Elba enjoys this schedule, because it gives her more time to pursue her enduring passion as a homemaker. “I consider myself a home-body and like taking care of our household when I am not at the seminary. Being a ‘mom’ is a large part of who I am and I need it.”

This is something you would guess about Elba if you spent a little time with her. While she is a capable professional in the CLI office, she is in essence a “mom” in the best sense of the word, whose motherly care extends to students, faculty, co-workers, and the whole CLI enterprise. We’re lucky to have her!

Editor's Column: Shall We Dance?
by Steve McKinley

Those of you who know me personally might find this hard to believe, but I assure you that it is true. Thanks to a Christmas gift from one of our daughters, my lovely wife Pat and I are now taking ballroom dancing lessons. What we are doing bears little resemblance to the performances on “Dancing With The Stars,” but it is a higher form of dancing than we have done in the past. Pat was always capable of something better, but she was handicapped by a clumsy partner with two left feet. The local “Fred Astaire Studio” has not yet turned me into Fred himself, but I am making progress. As I write to you, I am no longer intimidated by the fox trot, the waltz, the rumba and the tango. By the time you read this…who knows?

But I still have this preacher’s disease that leads me to find metaphors everywhere, so as I am learning dancing, I am thinking about ministry. For example:

  • At our first lesson Chad, our instructor, made it clear to me that it was my role to lead. “The man leads,” Chad said. “If he doesn’t lead, you’ve either got chaos or nothing happens at all. It doesn’t mean he’s smarter. It doesn’t mean he’s a better dancer. It simply means that it is his responsibility to lead.” Aha! Something like a pastor in a congregation. A pastor in a congregation has the responsibility to lead. It doesn’t mean that she is a better Christian. It doesn’t mean that he is smarter. It means that leadership is a pastor’s responsibility. If the pastor doesn’t lead, you’ve either got chaos or nothing happens at all.
     
  • In its simplest, most basic form, the rumba is a dance that goes nowhere. Two quick sliding steps to the side, two slower steps forward. Two quick sliding steps to the other side, two slower steps backward. A box. Takes up only a few square feet. Haven’t you seen congregations like that? Congregations going nowhere? Even when I do my leading task properly, at this level we go nowhere. In lessons to come, we will learn to go somewhere with the dance. I figure leadership isn’t really leadership if it isn’t going anywhere.
     
  • The other night we attended what is called “A Practice Party.” Students at various levels of proficiency come together to, well, practice. Terror sent chills down my spine when Chad, who was in charge of the party, announced a mixer, which meant that first I had to do the fox trot and then the tango with someone other than Pat. I suppressed a sudden urge to run to the car. And I did it. Not well, but I did it. When I wasn’t hyperventilating, I watched the other couples and noticed that Leon, who could dance so smoothly with his regular partner Naomi, had trouble getting into the rhythm with Samantha. They kept bumping into each other. He stepped on her feet, and she on his. I thought of the pastors I have known who could “dance” smoothly with one congregation, but then when they moved to another congregation, could never quite get in sync with that new congregation, nor the congregation with the pastor.
     
  • Here’s a dancing basic for you: both partners need to agree on the dance being done. If one partner is doing a tango and the other a waltz, there’s going to be a problem. Once again, this made me think of pastors and congregations. Conflict results when the pastor is leading a tango and the congregation is sticking with a waltz.
     
  • At first we did our dancing without music. We simply did the steps. Then the music was added. This was confusing for me. Before I could concentrate on just doing the right steps. Now I had to coordinate those steps with the music. I had to listen to the music and respond to it. This was more exciting, but harder. I thought of those pastors and congregations I have known who seem to be dancing without music. They are simply “doing their own thing.” They aren’t bothering to listen to the music of the street, the world around them; or maybe even to the ever-challenging music of the Gospel. I think their dancing would be better if they listened to the music!

Interns, at this point in your life you are learning to be better dancers. Supervisors and lay committees, you are the dancing instructors. Like all instructors, you will no doubt learn more about the dancing by teaching it. This is good. And one thing more. Pat points out to me that while we are dancing my face sometimes looks stern, but it looks stern simply because I am concentrating. The truth is I am having great fun. May your dance of ministry be just as much fun!

The Lay Committee and Mid-Year Evaluations    
by Alicia Vargas

By this time of the internship year, the Lay Committee has already done a lot of work. The special group of lay members that have accepted the responsibility to be a guiding presence for the intern has welcomed the intern, and if applicable, her/his family; it has made sure the housing details were in order; it has offered orientation and tips on how to navigate the local waters of community and congregation; it has held several monthly meetings with the student; it has gotten to know the intern better and better; it has prayed together with him/her; and it has begun to point out areas where the student shines, and the areas where the student needs to focus for the duration of the internship. Now is the time to talk about and to write down some of the observations that the committee has had up to this point.

The mid-year evaluations ask the same questions as the final evaluations. The final evaluations form the basis for the official reports that are written and that are placed in the new pastors’ permanent files. The mid-year evaluation is not final. It is just an opportunity to take the pulse at mid-point, to talk about and write down how things are going. It is a reflection on how the student is fitting in her/his role in each of the different pastoral areas. It’s not a judgment that will gain or lose points for the student. It’s a help, a tool, for the student, and for his/her guides in the congregation to focus on the progress and the growth that is desired in the second half of the internship. It will certainly be of help at the end of the internship when the lay committee sits down again to talk and write the final evaluation. At the end of the internship the committee can refer back to the mid-year evaluation and ask: “How much has the student grown in the areas identified? What progress has been made?”

The CLI contact persons read the mid-year evaluations, and, if there areas of concern, the seminary will contact the internship team, supervisor, intern, lay committee chair to talk about strategies to facilitate progress and growth. As we at CLI read the mid-year evaluations, we rejoice with the students and the committees for all the hard work and blessed gifts that the interns offer to the congregation, and for all the hard work and blessed guidance that the congregations offer to the interns. A big piece of that guidance is the mid-year evaluation. Blessings on your work!

P.S. Remember, they are called “mid-year evaluations” because they are due at the mid year point. Yes, half of the internship has come and gone already! Please, be prompt in submitting them.

Spring Cluster Meetings

April 20-21 Northern Minnesota Cluster at Camp Knutson Laure Schwartz
April 24-25 Dakotas Cluster at Maryvale Retreat Center, Valley City, ND Steve McKinley
April 25 Twin Cities Metro North Cluster at Redeemer, Minneapolis Laure Schwartz
May 1-2 Oregon Cluster at Menucha Retreat Center, Portland Jean Larson
May 2 Southern Minnesota Cluster at Gustavus Adolphus College Steve McKinley
May 4-5 Montana Cluster in Great Falls Jean Larson
May 4 Twin Cities Metro East Cluster at Christ Lutheran on Capitol Hill, St. Paul Laure Schwartz
May 4 Twin Cities Metro South Cluster at Shepherd of the Lake, Prior Lake Steve McKinley
May 15-16 Washington Cluster at Dumas Bay Center, Federal Way (Pre-retreat May 14) Jean Larson
May 25 Arizona Cluster in Tucson, following Grand Canyon Synod Assembly Margy Schmitt-Ajer
June 6 Colorado Cluster at Abiding Hope, Littleton Margy Schmitt-Ajer
June 8-9 Northern California Cluster at San Damiano Retreat Center, Danville Margy Schmitt-Ajer
June 19-20 Southern California Cluster at Mary & Joseph Retreat Center, Rancho Palos Verdes Margy Schmitt-Ajer

Order for Your Lenten Devotional Book Now!   

This year's Lenten Devotional Book (an annual project of the Western Mission Cluster, joining Luther Seminary and Pacific Lutheran Theological Seminary) will be published soon. The authors for this year’s book, Into the Wilderness, are the members of the Contextual Leadership Initiative faculty and staff, the very friendly folks who work with you regularly in the internship program.

The Lenten devotions will also be available online as part of the God Pause Daily Devotions published by Luther Seminary.

New Interns   

Several new interns began their service under the auspices of the Western Mission Cluster in January. Welcome, new interns!

From PLTS:

  • Melissa Afdahl (Hope, San Mateo, CA)
  • LaVinnia Pierson (All Saints, Cupertino and Hope, Santa Clara, CA)
  • Derek Harman (Basse, Germany)

From Luther, beginning in January or February:

  • Craig Nehring (Bethel, Hawkins, WI)
  • Kari Burke-Romarheim (St. John's, Eau Claire, WI)
  • Jo Gast (Family of God, East Grand Forks, MN)
  • Kathy Herheim (Calvary, Golden Valley, MN)